• image credit: Netflix
    movie reviews

    Movie Review: Irish Wish (2024) ***

    I was fully prepared to five-star Irish Wish before I watched it. This checks all my boxes in concept: It’s sort of a holiday-themed Netflix romcom starring Lindsay Lohan. I love Falling for Christmas (2021). I don’t currently have St. Paddy’s Day movies on rotation, but I was willing to start a pile.

    Irish Wish features Lohan’s character wishing she were marrying her long-time crush while she’s in Ireland for his wedding. Thanks to magic, she swaps places with the bride (a friend of hers). Of course, this is a whole monkey’s paw affair, where it turns out what she wants isn’t what she needs. The changed circumstances highlight to Lohan that she’s not meant to be with the crush. It also helps her realize she’s in love with the guy who played Jack Crusher on Picard.

    The milieu establishes that love is a soul mates affair, and I like soul mates in a fantasy setting. Crush and Friend manage to fall in love again despite the situation-swap. And when Lohan manages to undo her wish, she still ends up with Jack Crusher. They were always meant to be. Aww.

    Lohan is perfect in this. Even better than Falling for Christmas! (Which came from the same creative team, too.)

    This is as good as any Netflix romcom, with all the usual asterisks added and then dismissed. You don’t eat Kraft dinner and complain it didn’t taste like filet mignon.

    There have also been a lot of monarchist nonsense in Netflix romcoms, and those tend to be my less-favorite. Fantasies of wealth (and the accompanying security) are a staple of the romcom genre in general. I don’t begrudge anyone their fantasies of security, but I appreciate when a romance makes it easier to swallow by taking us far, far away from real-life politics. Give me Aldovia instead of England, please. (Letterboxd)

    Irish Wish did not distance itself from real imperial politics.

    The wealthy crush’s family lives in Killruddery House (Wikipedia), an English-occupier house in Elizabethan style. The only filming location necessary to Ireland is the Cliffs of Moher, a famous tourist destination, which feels like a very shallow scoop off the top of Irish-themed things. And Lohan’s tricky little wish isn’t manipulated from one of the many potential local Irish spirits, but Saint Brigid. (Wikipedia)

    The mere inclusion of Brigid explicitly in her saint form is one markedly post-Christian reformation. In an attempt to be fair, I’ll note that an overwhelming percentage of modern Irish people identify as Catholic. 94.1% of Irish identified as Catholics in a 1961 census; even in the 2022 census, 69% continue to identify as Catholic. I tripped across these numbers reading a nuanced essay about Brigid as a historical saint, pre-Christian goddess(es), and as a title on Stone, Soil, and Soul. (It’s a substantial and worthy read.)

    Paganism isn’t just history in Ireland; as with most indigenous cultures, contemporary peoples continue to observe their traditions. (Psyche) The colonial presence of the British still hasn’t been accepted either. A united Republic of Ireland continues to be a hot topic, and the party in favor for election this year would pursue it. (NPR)

    Hence Irish Wish calls itself Irish, but it’s a specific Ireland: a colonized, Catholic Ireland, where Lindsay Lohan’s crush is a selfish manipulative Irish-accented occupier whose family wealth comes from conquering and her Happily Ever After comes with the much-cooler English hero. Why is the romantic couple American and English in a movie with “Irish” in the title? Kind of a letdown, y’all.

    It’s a reminder of the deeply conservative nature at the heart of Hallmark-style romcoms.

    In this case, my Kraft dinner came tainted with a memory of my Irish grandma swearing about the English, and there was no way I could possibly enjoy it as much as Falling for Christmas.

    So I guess this one isn’t starting off my St. Paddy’s Day-themed watch list. Considering St. Patrick was all about converting the Irish to Christianity (Time), I wasn’t married to it anyway, but I really like all the silly green decorations of the holiday, and I like having an excuse to slap Irish flags and cartoon leprechauns on everything. I’m not gonna say I’ll never revisit (Lindsay Lohan is so charming! she’s doing great y’all! I love to see it!) but I’m not keen on this approach at all. I’ll keep my fingers crossed for my grandma’s dream of an English-free Ireland though.

    (image credit: Netflix)

  • source: Warner Bros.
    movie reviews

    Movie Review: The Cell (2000) *****

    The Cell (2000) starring J.Lo is a science fiction horror movie about entering a serial killer’s mind to locate a victim who hasn’t yet died in his basement. It’s very sexual, very gory. It looks like the music video for Closer by Nine Inch Nails and somehow feels a bit like Silent Hill, though its closest genetic relative is surely Silence of the Lambs (1991).

    I can’t explain why this is one of my favorite cozy movies BUT IT IS. There is something truly SO COZY and reassuring about the flimsy serial killer genre. Where they are monsters, not people. Where there is some mystery to unpack and not merely senseless violence. Where law enforcement CARE and are hellbent on solving problems.

    As usual, mental illness is thrown under the bus for our serial killer here. He’s got a kind of fictitious viral schizophrenia called “Whelan’s Infraction,” which is magically brought about by trauma involving water. In this case, our killer was “activated” by a violent baptism.

    Law enforcement catches him early in the movie, but Whelan’s Infraction has rendered him sorta-semi-braindead and he has a living victim with ~40 hours left.

    Luckily my wife J.Lo has been working as an unusual kind of therapist: she goes into the mind of a sick billionaire’s son using a fictitious machine. This “neurological connectic transfer system” can “map the mind and send the signal to another party.”

    This is in an era (have we even left that era?) where people are obsessed with this idea that there are broken little children inside serial abusers, giving them mystique and charm. Its story depends on the extremely common mistaken assumption that a childhood history of abuse explains adult abusers. “Why Does He Do That?” by Lundy Bancroft is an interesting rebuttal to that myth (though I recommend reading it with caution, as it’s very triggering).

    I don’t mind the pseudoscience, including the bad psychology. Everything about The Cell feels unreal, inside and outside the shared dreamscapes, in a manner that is extremely cohesive. After all, The Cell is firmly in the fantasy universe where cops Actually Do Stuff and serial killers are brilliant; why bother with real science?

    As I get older, the more I see The Cell as a fetish fantasy. It’s always obviously had major elements of fetishism. As I’ve grown, I’ve seen how many people really have explicitly serial killer, horror, and murder-related fantasies as part of their sex life, and i’m like, ohhhhhh. That’s what I’m watching. Perhaps my associations of the security in a well-controlled BDSM environment are also why I find it so cozy!

    The performances are really good too.

    Vince Vaughn is the lead detective in the movie. Yes, THAT Vince Vaughn. His role is not meant to be remotely comic, but I still laugh at everything he says. They realize the killer (Vincent D’Onofrio) has an albino dog. And Vince Vaughn says all grittily, “He’d love a dog like that.” SURE VINCE. His performance doesn’t detract from the film; I would have no notes if I weren’t familiar with him from other media.

    The ability for J.Lo to commit to a movie where she was surely not seeing things we’re seeing, in sequential order, cannot be overstated. Director Tarsem Singh does a LOT of practical effects, but even so, there’s a lot here demanding an actor’s very best imagination. She’s extremely believable. (Fun fact: according to IMDB, Sandra Bullock was originally meant to play this role. I can imagine it, but I also think it would have been a weird fit for her career.)

    The physicality of Vincent D’Onofrio’s performance is so amazing. He manages to feel both like a vulnerable boy at times, and like a looming monster at others. He is beautiful and ugly.

    Last time I watched The Cell, I was coming off a Hannibal/Lambs binge, and I enjoyed it but the story felt more lacking. Coming at it from watching more horror movies, it felt pitch-perfect. This is a great example of a movie that makes more emotional sense than rational sense, much like The Fountain (2006).

    ~

    On a note about the format I watched: The Cell doesn’t seem popular enough to have a remaster, so my version has those dots up in the corner indicating reel changes. There’s a lot of other visual grit too! The Cell is very consciously cut so that there are dramatic tonal/visual shifts whenever reels change! Many movies used to be edited with TV commercial breaks in mind as well, and it’s striking how anachronistic it feels a quarter of a century later.

    (Image credit: Warner Bros.)

    (This review was adapted from my live watch thread on Bluesky.)

  • bluesky,  facebook

    end of winter ramblings

    Posted 2/25/24.

    I’ve seen art students go from stick figures to fully rendered oil painting style in less than four years of study. Most people don’t need to get that good, and you’ll start getting drawings you like a LOT sooner, and you also get loads of dopamine from the process.

    AI feeds into your insecurity. So many people are like “I’m going to sit down and do this!” and then they can’t handle the fact they suck at it, so they quit. To paraphrase Adventure Time, sucking at something is the first step to being awesome at something. You just have to accept sucking a lot for a while. Don’t be a coward.

    Use of AI to illustrate is cowardly and lazy. You’re going to be here in four years; the time will pass either way. Work on your shit. Take classes. Study technique broadly. Practice what you like a lot. (I mostly stick to an illustrative style and it’s REALLY SATISFYING)

    …I don’t like the grumpy tone of my own thread because I want to be nurturing rather than mean, always, but I get SO FRUSTRATED. this AI shit is death by a thousand knives. I struggle to be at my kindest when it feels so awful all the time.


    Posted 2/26/24.

    Why Is My Decade Old C-Section Scar Bothering Me Again? And Other Reasons I Find Body Horror Relatable: A Memoir

    ~

    repeating to myself: two dogs is enough, two dogs is enough, two dogs is enough–

    ~

    9yo Sunshine told me that emoticons are better than emojis. “Do you know what emoticons are?” he asked me, like I wasn’t using them twenty years before he was born.

    Apparently : ) is better at expressing emotions online than 🙂, which is cartoony and cheesy.

    I birthed tech hipsters.

    ~

    My 13yo and I were watching an interview with Biden from last night (the one on Seth Meyers). I knew what Biden was talking about so I could follow him, but it was difficult; 13yo couldn’t follow him at all. Then I put on the 2008 Obama acceptance speech and blew my kid away.

    I’m like, “Can you believe we ever had a president who could actually talk?” and they were like “wtf that happens?” They were born in the Obama era but don’t remember him. As far as they’re concerned, America is defined by Trump. Ain’t that depressing.

    fwiw Obama had a *lot* of problems because, you know, president of an incredibly violent empire, but also, on the shallowest level possible, he was *incredibly* attractive.

    I am biased toward Obama because his administration had such massively tangible helpful impacts on my life. Thanks to his admin, I had insurance through my parents until I was 26; I also *had* to be given space/time to pump at the office. I would not have been able to nurse Eldest without the ACA. I have always been Medically Complicated so I have an emotional attachment to the president spearheading the admin that spared me a lot of active fear and gave me better access to healthcare. god, his admin also passed the laws that let me buy my first house. like! they helped me so much.


    Posted 2/27/24.

    I was joking with my kid about naming our next dog “Jesus” and the idea is so funny to me, I can’t get it out of my head

    Imagine yelling for Jesus at the dog park

    Calling the vet to make an appointment for Jesus


    Posted 2/28/24.

    I must come to grips with the fact that I am fully a conspiracy theorist who loves random drama. For instance: I still totally believe in Fake Melania, Disney made “Frozen” so you can’t easily google about Walt being frozen,

    and I am SO eyeballs-deep in Kate Middleton conspiracies.

    ~

    snuggly bedtime with my 9yo is still just the best time <33 also brushing my 13yo's hair <33333 ~ I thought I could handle doing a Dark Urge BG3 run if I skewed toward redemption, but there’s no preventing what happens when [SPOILER] joins your camp and they are one of my FAVORITES and now idk I don’t wanna I get really attached to everyone in this game ~ After being off cannabis for a bit over a month now, I think it's safe to say that I am just a silly nonsensical person in general and that's not going anywhere. 😆


    Posted 2/29/24.

    Another smoldering migraine day. Can I just chop my head off maybe?


    Posted 3/1/24.

    I had two writing sessions today. I want to reorient myself toward writing-for-publication, but it’s been hard. I had to learn a lot of new skills to write my gothic fantasy book – it was extremely intense to write, and extremely meticulous to edit so far – but it was really easy to commit myself to writing sessions because it’s all I wanted to think about. Working on ATTBTM feels like a beautiful dark dream.

    The Descentverse never felt like that. It was something I wrote to cope because I didn’t have any coping abilities. You’ll recognize Rylie’s werewolf as a metaphor for mental illness run rampant and autistic meltdowns. Elise represents so much of my anger toward men (fathers in specific). My overwhelm from medical trauma, and a desire to be hurt, is all over Deirdre’s books. And so on.

    But nowadays…I feel better. I have other ways of working on my stuff. Which means I need to find a whole other way to write books that I’m not using to cope, and which aren’t a dreamy love affair like the gothic fantasy book. I want to be able to write projects that I *choose* rationally. I don’t need to do a *lot*. I just need to be able to put out a book or two a year that has some relationship to the market.

    This begins by finishing the most important outstanding projects: Fated for Firelizards and Young Swords. Neither of these scratch my happy itch. I don’t need to hide from reality in them. So how do I build a healthy working relationship with writing instead of… *gestures at the wasteland of my life*

    I think it’s going to involve scheduling somehow. Schedules are hard. BUT today I managed to get myself in for two writing sessions, and that is super good. Longer sessions, or a third session, could get me back to a reasonable rate of writing, but I think it’s gonna be more important to write *daily* since I like to spend whole days crocheting/drawing now. Gotta figure out how to balance it. I’m sure I can do it now.

    Once I’m done with those, I can finish my horror novel, and THEN I can start on the litfic I’ve been percolating. It’s a take on Bluebeard’s wife among the nouveau riche, it’s gonna be a real spicy one! The only other project that jumps to me is a cyberpunk-sorta thing that I’ve been percolating *even longer* (literally a decade now) but I kinda hope that publishing litfic will better position folks to understand what I’m doing with the cyberpunk thing.

    (I think this will also be easier now that I quit weed, but quitting caffeine is a special added challenge lol)


    Posted 3/3/24.

    As a loud, energetic, imaginative youngest child, it took me a LONG time to contextualize the Annoying label. I got it a lot. I still think of myself as annoying occasionally, but it’s okay to be a little annoying.

    I was just talking with my spouse about the labels we’re given in childhood and how they can really stick with us. I was also labeled Liar by my dad. Nothing I said could be believed. I was constantly told I was doing things I absolutely was not. I was an Annoying Liar. Y’all, that is a LOT for someone to come up with.

    I know some of y’all have come up with even more, even worse labels, and I think sometimes those attitudes follow us into adulthood when we should have long since let them go.


    Posted 3/4/24.

    i’m a lil bummed that my most popular review on letterboxd is currently snark about j.lo’s documentary. all the time i’ve spent writing thoughtful review essays, and of course the one that gets any traction whatsoever (still quite minor) is when i’m just snarking about batshittery.

    i remember the first time i read a sarcastic recounting of a movie. it was oooold internet, talking 2002, early livejournal. someone recounted the events of queen of the damned sarcastically. it was seismic! a major influence on how i regard *everything*. of course i also review like that sometimes.

    but i don’t really wanna do that as a THING because it’s also a little bit mean and it plays into our less-favorable instincts as humans. yk? i wanna have fun without the mean bits. it makes me wanna just delete the review. don’t LOOK AT THAT ONE

    ~

    Cutting caffeine out of my system has killed me. I am dead. Nothing works. Don’t have words. Life is sleep.


    Posted 3/5/24.

    I wish I had a salon chair at home tbh. I do everyone’s hair and I’ve started also doing skincare for my family, and it sorta feels like tending five people is excuse enough for the setup. I like fussing over everyone. It’s very pleasant. It would be easier if I could just sit them in a chair and recline them to a sink to do the wash/rinse. facials would also be easier like that.

    but salon chairs are not exactly small and it’s not like i can just…leave it in front of my kitchen sink. or any other sink. and once i start thinking about putting in a sink just for the chair, it gets into “too big/messy/expensive/complex” territory.


    Posted 3/5/24.

    Natalie Portman got divorced, so I’m pretty sure that means I have a chance


    Posted 3/9/24.

    did i ever tell y’all about the time i met a friend’s boyfriend for the first time, and he said “i don’t like man-hating feminists” and i whipped around to growl at him with demon eyes: “I AM THE MAN-HATING FEMINIST”?

    i’ll take “least surprising stories about sara” for twenty, alex


    Posted 3/10/24.

    My grandpa visited me for my birthday. It was also just his birthday.

    Me: Happy birthday!

    Grandpa’s girlfriend: He’s eighty-three now.

    Me: Wow, grandpa! You’re finally old enough to be president!

    I just had to share that with you guys because I think it’s the funniest I’ve ever been in my life.

    That said, this dude still fully does all his manual labor around the property (he has a pretty big acreage) and he’s sharp as a tack, which is why I don’t really care about any presidential candidate’s age. It’s all about policies. But that’s not the point of my story, the point of my story is that I’m hilarious.


    Posted 3/12/24.

    I know I’m an idiot because every time something I’ve written gets ripped off/copied, my reaction is mostly “good, you never could have made something that great on your own. Out here improving the mean quality of writing and not even trying 💅🏻”

  • sara reads the feed

    Toxic Community, cicada wee, weakly heteros

    My life is pretty boring right now. I’m mostly just sitting around being available to my kids when they need me, aggregating information about the outside world, ignoring mealybugs on my plants, getting wrist pain from crocheting, drawing silly cartoons, and Having A Lot of Opinions.

    I’d still normally have interesting things to say about that, but lowering my caffeine intake has really kicked my butt. If you’re bored about hearing how I am not Getting Anything Done because of multiple successive withdrawals, don’t worry. I’m bored of experiencing it. This crap takes months.

    Plus all these substances are how I’ve self-medicated my neurocognitive issues, so everything I know about Getting Stuff Done In That Condition is useless to me now. I have to relearn like. everything. again.

    ~

    I’ve been banging on the “power companies are going to kill us all” drum ever since the Camp Fire in Paradise, California killed so many people, thanks to PG&E’s unmaintained infrastructure. That was over five years ago now. I wrote a book partially inspired by it called “His Memory in Ashes.” Anyway, the huge Texas panhandle fire this year was…drumroll please…caused by unmaintained infrastructure from the power company. (NPR) This is gonna keep happening. There has been no political willpower to fix it and the people with money don’t wanna.

    ~

    NPR published the most selfish article about how a wife’s desire to have Her Old Life Back is equally (or more) important as her high risk husband’s desire to mask against COVID. You know what, lady? I bet he’d like to have his old life back too. A lot of us would. Public health doesn’t matter to America. We would rather just let people die and be disabled so that people like you can fuck around with the illusion of having Your Old Life Back.

    ~

    In ongoing “Community is a great show that had the most absolutely toxic work environment possibly ever” news, Joel McHale reports he once dislocated Chevy Chase’s shoulder in a scuffle. (Variety) I’m sure nobody was sad he did that, but even so.

    ~

    BookRiot recommended Black Paradox by Junji Ito. I haven’t read that one so I’m gonna pick it up.

    ~

    Cosmopolitan talks about the human rights violations of child labor in influencer families (my phrasing, not theirs).

    ~

    You know I can’t resist Weird Organism Stories so here’s an Ars Technica piece about how cicadas pee in jets instead of droplets. Amazing!

    ~

    Ars Technica also reports on Air Pods Pro possibly getting “hearing aid” mode, which is cool. I actually use the “aware” mode on my noise-cancelling headphones (I have both Apple and Bose) to limit the amount of auditory input I receive from the world, which is kinda the opposite thing, but I already think of them as accessibility devices is the point here.

    ~

    A private space rocket launched in Japan exploded seconds after leaving the launching pad. Bummer for the company, but awesome for those of us who like to watch explosions. (AJE)

    ~

    Colbert’s studio didn’t want him to show KStew’s Rolling Stone cover. (Variety) The heteros really just can’t handle the raw sexual power of gender fuckery. They’re so weak.

    ~

    Netflix is putting Jennifer Lopez in a mecha suit. I’m so happy. (TSFKA Tor dot com)

    ~

    A company is gonna try mining helium-3 from lunar regolith. (Ars Technica) There’s nothing humans won’t try to exploit, even our Moon.

    ~

    Lawyers, Guns, and Money shared a good chunk of an interesting NYMag article about gender/sex. NYMag is paywalled, so the LGM link is the one I’m sharing.

  • essays,  movies

    Alien (1979) is a great lesson in cinema for horror kids

    Yesterday I watched Alien (1979) with 13yo Moonlight, the eldest of my offspring. I’ve been musing how to review it since. The greatness of Alien is well-understood. Even Letterboxd rates it at an average of 4.3, and I seldom run across movies so uncontroversial.

    On a personal level, as a writer and as a child-bearer, I think Alien is fascinating in how queer it is. Secondary character Joan Lambert is canonically mtf trans per its sequel. Ripley was written to be a man and gender-swapped. (CBR) The order in which people are killed on the Nostromo is “woke” enough to please a modern moviegoer like myself; they clear out the white men (including one android) before killing Yaphet Kotto’s character, then Lambert, and gender neutral Ripley is left as final girl along with her final cat. Horror deaths are known to be moralistic: it is inevitable that the people seen as “bad” in some way (promiscuous, drinkers, drug-users, queers, and often nonwhite people) will be killed first, and the final girl is ultimately the purest of them. Alien’s kill order alone can be seen as a political statement.

    As the movies continued, the pregnancy body horror of it all is further teased out and expanded upon, but even Ridley Scott’s initial outing has undertones of pregnancy commentary. It’s queered up by implanting an unwilling man with a baby alien in this first movie. It reminds me an awful lot of my nonbinary ass exploding my second baby via emergent c-section.

    These subjects have been thoroughly explored by others, and way better than I could. I don’t want to explore them again. I don’t have anything to say except that “There is a shortage of perfect movies in this world. It would be a pity to fail to recognize this one.”

    Instead, I’d like to note that Alien is a perfect horror movie to share with kids as part of cinema education. I think kids inclined toward horror tastes should watch Alien.

     

    Raising conscientious horror kids

    My kids have grown up in an era where horror for kids is an entire *thing*. Mascot Horror as a subgenre (TV Tropes) has been defined, if not outright invented, in the time of my kids’ lives; much like Mommy, they enjoy a dark skew to their content, so it’s natural they would fall in with Mascot Horror.

    Navigating horror for kids as a mother is interesting. I believe a lot of families either ban violent/disturbing content outright, or simply stay hands-off their kids’ media diets, because either options is easier than trying to navigate it with them. Parenting is *always* a matter of too many concerns and not enough time/energy to handle it. Media consumption is low priority compared to the numerous high demands of Life.

    When my peer parents were blocking YouTube so their kids wouldn’t get tangled up in extremely dodgy Elsagate stuff (Wikipedia), we chose to let them stay online, unfiltered, unblocked. We kept our media consumption devices in the same room for many years so that we could keep an ear/eye on what they were watching, and “Pick a different video!” was a frequent call across that room. This spurred conversations about why we thought a video wasn’t appropriate. We told them how to navigate these things themselves, and one of my main urgings was simply: “If it makes you feel weird or bad, don’t watch it.”

    Of course, they watched stuff when we weren’t supervising, and they ended up having to figure out how to filter things for themselves. Multiple times, they brought videos, games, and memes to me with questions, or just generally asking for feedback; knowing that they would never be in trouble created a fertile ground for us to communicate.

    The result is kids who have extremely developed opinions about what they like, what is good and bad, what is safe and what isn’t. They know what to do with themselves on the internet and among media. They like horror a lot. That part has never changed.

     

    Kids’ media is pretty nuts anyway

    What kind of horror is “safe” for kids?

    Critically, I must point out that plenty of non-horror for kids is upsetting as hell. Kids’ media is often much more upsetting than you’d think. Consider legendarily upsetting content like Bambi, Where the Red Fern Grows, The Brave Little Toaster, The Bridge to Terabithia. Kids’ media often goes straight for the places kids are most vulnerable, like death of parents, or separation from family. This stuff is scary already!

    If anything, a movie like Alien is soft for kids. They are in no real, tangible risk of going to a planet in Zeta Reticuli, getting attacked by face-grabbers, and then hunted throughout the Nostromo by a big juicy monster.

    Alien also isn’t all that scary for most of its length. Most of it is tension and build-up, deliciously so. Deaths mostly occur off-screen. The effects are great, but not too egregious.

    I wouldn’t watch an especially gory movie with the kids, but they do play shooter games, and some level of tension and violence is fine. That rules out less-tense horror-comedy movies like Renfield, which loooves gore. The sexualization of Ripley is minimal in screen-time, which is also a concern with kids’ comfort levels. I can’t show them the hilarious Chopping Mall, for instance, because that’s in a much more exploitative tradition of horror. M3gan was a great horror movie for kids (to the point it’s kinda too boring for adults). We’re All Going to the World’s Fair is an amazing queer horror movie for the internet generation, but it’s incredibly slow and vibe-based, appealing more to Millennials.

    Alien stands on top of all of these. It’s not too gory, but it’s a little gross (like the robot exploding into a glitchy white-blood mess). It doesn’t have sex scenes. It’s also, frankly, just a great movie.

     

    A whole cinema culture class in a single film

    I actually watched Alien with Moonlight for the first time when they were eight, maybe nine years old. It’s more a feat of attention span than enduring anything scary at that age. Considering Moonlight was neck-deep in FNAF at the time, and well inured to jump scares, they mostly walked away thinking it was fun to watch a movie with so much space ship in it. (Space ships are awesome.)

    A few years later, Moonlight has seen 2001: A Space Odyssey, and loads more movies for grown-ups. They asked to watch Alien again. A young teenager is capable of thought abstraction in a way that an 8-9yo is not. I realized that Alien was kind of a perfect movie to watch in order to teach them more about cinema in general.

    We had great discussions while watching Alien. It serves as a platform for lots of topics.

     

    Alien has strong visual language. It begins slowly, with long shots of the vessel’s exterior and interior, and shots are roomy. The pacing is methodical. At first, the most dramatic things are considered with a sort of distance; medical procedures performed on the first victim are partially viewed through windows by the other crew.

    Immediacy of the style increases as the emotional intensity does, too. By the time Parker and Lambert are attacked, the shots come quick and tightly framed. Ripley’s survivalist last act loses all the methodical dolly shots and steadycam, shaking more as the camera runs along with her.

    Moonlight specifically noted the use of strobe light as a way to increase agitation in the viewers. Strobe is very unpleasant, but it makes you feel anxious like Ripley does, whether or not you’re paying close attention.

     

    In context, Alien teaches about cultural call-and-response. Not only has Alien influenced countless media that came after it, there are prominent elements in conversation with major predecessors. The style of the early moments are a lot like 2001: A Space Odyssey (ten years Alien’s predecessor) and the long panning shot of the Nostromo’s underside is a lot like the first sight of a Star Destroyer in Star Wars: A New Hope (two years Alien’s predecessor).

    I’d actually say one of its biggest influences is Jaws (four years Alien’s predecessor). I might even argue that Alien is best described as Jaws vs 2001.

    All media is engaged in cultural call-and-response, and this is important for people to understand. It’s how you learn to tell what’s derivative versus what’s genre trope versus what’s a direct reference to add commentary to something else. You could not have Sunshine or Event Horizon without Alien, nor many other SF/horror movies. You also probably wouldn’t have Doom or Half-Life without Alien. The impact is seismic, and accentuating this element to young cinemaphiles can provide context for a whole lotta culture.

     

    The politics of Alien are fascinating. Moonlight is the cusp of Gen Z and Alpha; their generation is not expected to do better than my generation, which is not expected to do better than our parents’ generation. A lot of this is due to runaway unregulated corporations. But this problem isn’t new. In 1979, Alien pointed a finger shamelessly at a parent corporation (Weyland-Yutani) for its unethical practices.

    At some point, the movie reveals that the corporation deliberately sent the Nostromo to retrieve alien specimens and bring them back to Earth, regardless of how many crew died in the process. You can easily tie this to the unethical practices of unregulated corporations by watching a few episodes of John Oliver. It’s always been a practice for Big Money to throw lives away in pursuit of profit. (In this film, Ripley theorizes Weyland-Yutani wants the aliens for military use; it’s expanded upon elsewhere in the franchise.)

    As I mentioned in the beginning of this post, the deployment of horror tropes and who the movie kills first is also extremely political. We often think of the past as being more regressive. But we’re in a time when trans people are spectacularly unsafe and often targeted directly by policies and less directly by stochastic terrorists; more than forty years ago, we had a movie casually throw in a couple of *very* gender nonconforming characters, one of which was trans. These are the kind of people society often marginalizes and feeds to the meat grinder.

    The fight we’re fighting now isn’t new! For all its antique-looking retrofuturism, Alien had a lot of ideas we’re still battling with, right now.

     

    Alien is defined more by what it doesn’t show than what it does. It remains a truism of art that the best stuff happens off-screen (off-page, in the gutter, out of frame, etc), and Alien demonstrates this element of craft perfectly.

    The truth is that you don’t need great special effects to tell the story you want. Alien *does* have great special effects, but a lot of it is never really seen beyond glimpses. That’s not the point.

    The focus remains on a naturalistic approach to the characters–showing them working, in their common life, with minimal backstory. We don’t really know why Ripley is so calculated and intelligent, but you feel like you know her anyway. Natural closure describes everything you have to know. This kind of subtlety is often lacking from blockbuster products in our current era, but understanding the raw power of closure opens up so much media to the viewers, and it makes for better artists, too.

     

    Alien is a perfect movie to talk about cinema and art at large, and it’s a perfect lesson for horror kids in general. This is one of those evergreen flicks that I think should be taught to everyone for generations to come.

  • sara reads the feed

    Headaches, other folks review stuff, fundie baby voice

    I have no idea how to make myself write something I don’t “feel like” working on. I know I used to do it somehow. It’s driving me crazy though — whenever I try to prioritize a project I Don’t Feel Like Working On, I just kinda stop working completely. On the other hand, if it’s something I really really like that turns me into a dopamine machine, I can keep it up for hours.

    Maddening.

    ~

    My iPad isn’t charging for some reason, and I use it *constantly* for drawing, so I am a little freaked out. Trying not to panic. I don’t want to already go buy another new one, though. I swear I just got this one…two years ago, maybe? Less? Of course I never do warranties.

    I need to investigate more before really freaking out about it. It’s my drawing machine though. 🙁 I’ve been drawing a lot lately! I cannot do the same style by hand, or using my computer’s drawing tablet!

    ~

    I can’t really do much of anything or emotionally process in a healthy way when I’ve had this stupid headache for so long, though.

    ~

    I wish I had never confessed in private to my family that I was going to miss the George Santos impressions on late night tv because somehow THAT QUEEN HEARD ME and he’s running again. (NPR) George Santos…no. Just no. Please God don’t.

    ~

    Disappointing to see “Cabrini” trending on TSFKA Twitter and learn it’s another weirdo right wing reactionary flick. (Variety) I thought it might be related to Candyman, which partially takes place at Cabrini-Green. On the bright side, looking up Cabrini-Green’s spelling led me to an utterly fascinating article about its history. (All That’s Interesting)

    ~

    Nicole at Thoughts Stained with Ink has been reading/enjoying the Mead Mishaps series.

    ~

    Daniel D’Addario at Variety insists that Bradley Cooper’s Oscar run for Maestro was not thirsty. To that, I reply, lmao. No.

    ~

    America has been trying to airdrop aid to Gazans. One airdrop killed five people when the parachute failed. (AJE)

    ~

    Activision at Microsoft has the biggest video game union: six hundred-some quality control workers have banded together. (Engadget)

    ~

    Mexico brought back bullfighting. I’m never sure what to think about that — I don’t personally love killing animals for sport, period, but I also am an Anglo American who frankly doesn’t need an opinion on an unrelated culture’s practices — so I present NPR’s article about female bullfighters without further commentary.

    ~

    After a three year journey in orbital free-fall, batteries from the ISS are on their way to uncontrolled reentry. (Ars Technica)

    ~

    Mostly gonna put this link here so I can cite it later if necessary: Immigrants less likely to commit crimes than U.S.-born Americans, study finds (NPR)

    ~

    WeGovy has gotten FDA approval of semaglutide as a treatment overweight/obesity in order to reduce risks of heart attack/stroke. (NPR) This is surely because insurance companies haven’t been wanting to pay (Ars Technica) out the nose for semaglutide used (until now) off-label for weight loss.

    ~

    Literally *right* before the Oscars, the screenwriter of The Holdovers has been accused of plagiarism. (Variety)

    ~

    I couldn’t watch much of the GOP response to the State of the Union address because of its weird delivery and unpleasant messaging. Digby’s Hullaballoo, however, has interesting insight about the “fundie baby voice” most of us have been agog at.

  • Doc Martin (the greatest show ever) Episode Recaps
    doc martin

    Doc Martin s1e2: “Gentlemen Prefer” (2004)

    This is an ongoing feature recapping episodes of the Greatest Show Ever, ITV’s “Doc Martin.” Please watch the episodes before reading if you don’t want spoilers.

    Doctor Martin Ellingham’s surgery has opened for its first patients. Unfortunately, Martin has a very particular idea of the way medicine should work, and the rest of the town doesn’t understand the rules he expects.

    On day one, his waiting room is filled with people who don’t have actual issues, but simply want to visit. Visiting with the former doctor seems to be something that the town used as social time. With a lot of lonely older people around, including one adorable widower, they certainly need a listening ear — but it’s not coming from Martin.

    His new assistant Elaine is also not behaving the ways he expects, so he fires her. And the town does not like it. Firing Elaine makes all of Portwenn immediately turn on their unfriendly doctor. Even a young patient he helped (and Martin says “I like you” to him!) utterly rejects Martin for this sin.

    In order for Martin to be a good doctor here, he must learn a whole set of new skills. It’s simply not the same as being a good doctor in London.

    He can’t be a doctor in London anymore, though, and this is the first time we get a glimpse at why. A bit of blood on his jacket sends him running for a bathroom. Oh no! Our not-so-beloved doctor has bloodphobia! This is a defining characteristic for Martin, and it’s so serious he throws out an entire perfectly good jacket just for getting a little blood on it. His little speech to a patient about the bloodphobia is extremely endearing.

    The medical mystery: What’s causing the raspy voice of former teacher Roger Fenn? There’s a lump in his throat, but he initially won’t accept a referral onward to a specialist.

    Fenn’s got a chip on his shoulder, which isn’t too different from Martin himself. Fenn felt like he was kicked out of his job, lost to Louisa Glasson, and he’s carried this anger through his life. Even to the point he’s trying to ignore cancer of the larynx.

    How can Martin get through to Fenn? His brusque personality isn’t working here either, at first, but frankly informing Fenn of his possible diagnosis does make an impact. Fenn goes on to become Martin’s first ally in the town. Martin changes, sure, but his competency is hard for anyone to ignore.

    The Assistant: Elaine’s not good at her job. A mother calls in because her child, Bobby, has stomach pain and vomiting, but Elaine fails to take down the actual name and number. Since she’s also showing up late to work and doesn’t double-check prescriptions, Martin fires her for the incompetence.

    Apparently this is the wrong thing to do because even Bobby’s mother is angry at him for firing Elaine. A local restaurant refuses to serve him for firing Elaine as well. She might be terrible at her job, but she’s still much better-liked than Martin.

    The Auntie: Ultimately, it’s Aunt Joan who talks sense into Martin…or something like that. Joan helped raise Martin; she knows he’s a pain in the ass. But she’s not on his side with the firing of Elaine, either. Her argument is the most sensible. To paraphrase the wisdom of Aunt Joan: “You suck too, Martin. Be forgiving.” Except imagine I said that with an English accent.

    The perspective she gives Martin is enough to get him growing, and he reaches out to be kind toward Elaine. The fact Elaine initially can’t accept that is not his fault, for once; however, his personal growth permits Elaine to close the gap between the two of them and regain her job. At least for the rest of the season.

    Louisa & Martin: Again, Louisa can’t stand Martin’s abrasive personality, but Roger Fenn is the one who can’t stand Louisa’s shallow kindness. Fenn actually needs Martin’s bad attitude in order to listen to medical advice. Louisa isn’t perfect, even when she fakes it. Although Louisa’s characterization isn’t wholly consistent throughout the show, one thing remains true: as critical as she can be of Martin, she also fails to see where she can be the problem.

    As usual, Martin proves that he’s better than everyone expects by showing up for Roger Fenn, and he and Louisa form a sort of three-person family of people who aren’t good at being liked.

    Favorite Quote: From Martin to his very first patient: “Collect a thousand loyalty points and you get a free coffin.”

    ~

    Louisa’s Hair Rating: 10/10. Rather than her later-standard ponytail, she’s got this half up, half down thing going on that looks extremely lush and fancy. I like her wispy bangs. This is a quality hairstyle, especially for 2004. She’s so pretty!!

    Infuriating Level: 10/10. Elaine is so! bad! at! her! job! Martin was correct to fire her, and the whole town turning on him is nuts. These people would die without a doctor, but it’s amazing nobody dies from Elaine’s general incompetency.

    Episode Greatness Level: 8/10. This is a pretty normal outing for the show, setting up a lot of the comfortable formula we enjoy through most of the seasons.